I Am Not Super Woman: Turning in My Cape

To Whom it May Concern:

I know I might have at one time called myself something along the lines of “Super Mom” or “Super Woman”, but today is a new day and I would like to turn in my cape.

It seems that under the delusion of possessing super human abilities I have bitten off more than I can chew.  It's not that I have  reached my saturation point, it's that I have long ago passed it.  I can't handle more than everybody else.  If I were "Super" I would have figured this out a long time ago.

I should have known that adopting three new puppies (even if they were rescue puppies and even if they are extra cute) was going to be a lot of work.  If I were "Super" I would have those pups housebroken already.  And guess what?  They aren't!  So while my heart may have been in the right place when I agreed to take those puppies in, my brain was somewhere else entirely.  It just was not smart.  Especially right before starting a giant remodeling project.

Speaking of that remodeling project…I should have known that it was pure insanity to think that we could live in the house during it.  I mean  hello.—they were going to be ripping out most of the floors and refinishing those they did not rip out.  Where exactly did I think we were going to walk?  On the ceiling?  Well, I suppose if I did have super powers, that I might have been able to do that.  But guess what?  I DON’T!  If I had super powers I would not be having asthma attacks from the mass quantities of dust I am breathing.  I would be impervious to dust.

When I said I was "super" I did not count on regular every day life things coming at me in hyper-speed.  For example…I was trying to get a bunch of errands run before leaving town and of course, that’s when some teenager drove into the side of my car.  So now I have to deal with the insurance and the body shop, not to mention a sore neck and various scrapes and bruises.  I know it could have been worse, but you know what???  Just this once, I feel like saying, “IT COULD HAVE BEEN A LOT BETTER, TOO!”   As in…it could have not happened in the first place!

And guess what just came in the mail?  I mean aside from the mountains of bills that I don’t have time to open and pay.  A summons for jury duty, that’s what.!  And of course the day I’m supposed to report is the first day that the boys were to start a summer camp in San Diego.  I had planned to take them down there and stay at my mom’s.  I don’t think I can commute to an L.A. courthouse from San Diego and then make it back to pick up the boys from camp in time.  And I don’t want to just ship them down to my mother and stay in L.A., because that’s when the flooring guys were going to put on the polyurethane so in order for me to be in L.A. I would have to stay at a hotel.

So Universe, God, Fate, Karma, or whomever this concerns—if you are listening (and it seems you always are)—for the record, I am sorry I declared myself “super”.  I am hereby taking that back.  I would like to have thrown at me just the normal amount of stuff that a normal woman can handle.  So my life can be normal, and I can feel like a normal person again instead of a stressed out harpie who is tired all the time and starting to break out.  There is nothing “super” about that.

Sincerely,

(No Longer Super) Susan